Kinky self pleasures: CBT

Reading time: 6 minutes

Happy (belated) new year, kinksters! Let’s cross fingers together for a year in which we can again hug and kiss each other with no fear for Covid. I’m so optimistic that in this 2021 things will change to positive that I already have the flight for Folsom Berlin in September!

I started the year with a tradition I have been doing for many years: my New Year’s Party. On January 1st I do a dildo play on my own.

I like to make this first play a special moment for myself, ritualistic, private. I choose a special full outfit for the occasion: some years full leather with chaps, other times full rubber, in a pair of occasions using a neoprene surf suit (with a strategic hole). To complete the outfit, I might pick the red, black or yellow hanky, Master’s collar of course, and I also pick all hoods and gags, to see during the session which ones I feel like using more.

Besides my big boys, I pick all those toys I feel I can play on my own. I pick all of them without making a plan, all available for what the inspiration brings: nipple clamps, magnetic balls, clothespins, ropes and leather toys for cock and balls, stretchers, and of course the electro box. There is always a starter before the anal play. Many years I have started with a first round of either clothespins zipper, sounding, CBT or hard nipple play, but now I start with electro as I can extend it into dildo play. I prepare myself a drink, this year one of my favourite ones, a sweet Cuba Libre with Captain Morgan.

Weird as it might sound for this context, I remember a lot one of my piano teachers in my youth. She advised me to learn different hobbies and try different things, rather than sticking to one single source of joy. In her view, as life changes, having different passions and tastes would allow me to be flexible and adapt. When for any reason I wouldn’t be able to continue with one, it would be easier to switch into another one and managing better the grief phase, with less sensation of experiencing a loss.

I think this is a valuable advise for all kinksters, as any day we might not be able to do some BDSM activity anymore – maybe it’s an ass the one asking for a long break, or the muscles unable to keep an agura position without cramps, or an unexpected health condition emerging.

Unfortunately, for many kinksters the day arrived, me included. Besides all the impact the current situation might have had for our relationships, stability and needs, we have the added frustration of not getting the usual relief, the one that calms the kinky side.

I don’t think that solo play is at the same level of a session with another kinkster. But for me, having developed a set of varied practices I can do to myself has mitigated a lot the kinky hunger. It’s not going to be like dinning in a 3 Michelin star restaurant, but I can make the burger taste spicy and different every time with some imagination and experimentation.

I want to share a list of solo activities that I enjoy. As these months everyone has already shared all those lists of ideas with training sessions, new recipes, yoga and Zumba through Zoom meetings, now it’s time for daddy Wolf to make the own personal list of suggestions through a series of posts about my favourite kinky self pleasures. Starting with… ball and cock stretching!

Indeed this was my first ever sexual play. I was 14 and suddenly in the solitude of my room, I started tying my balls with a leather belt – my mind brought me to do it, and I found it was bringing pleasure. I did some loops with it and ended doing my first ball stretcher. I pressed to close the belt and suddenly I came. It was my first jerking, discovered from the excitement from the leather belt-driven ball stretching.

This opened the door of the rope bondage applied on cock and balls, using shoe’s laces. I started with ball wrapping, just for the balls, and later the play extended into the ball and cock wrapping, usually with the pair of laces to mummify separately cock and ball.

After having the wrapping finished, I would put the undies and trousers up. Jeans have been always my preference, as they are hard and keep things pressed. With the ‘package’ prominent under the jeans, I would lay down on the bed and “fuck the bed” with the pack. Differently from when I was 14, I have now collars and I don’t need to improvise one with a second belt, to drive the fantasy of being forced to fuck as an animal forced to breed, or the way around as the ‘fuck-a-slave’ fantasy.

If this is unexplored territory to you, give it a try. Warm your balls up a bit if you want better feelings and that the balls are easier to handle, without pain. Cold balls are more difficult to work with, as the body is retracting them, and you can then harm yourself if forcing the things. And follow the recommendations from Uberkinky’s beginners guide before checking the different videos they have in this guide (the above 2 are part of this guide, by the way).

You will find different variations and patterns if you check in youtube for ‘bondage rope cock’. Adding my 2 cents, the key is making the tying process slow and applying even pressure in each wrap, well separated each at the side of the other one, plain with no undesired turns that cut the circulation or cause a pinch with some of the plays done after.

The balls stretched from the base and outwards, and the cock from the base of the glans into the base. In this direction, the cock gets strong. And if the glans base allows, make sure that the first loop under the glans is not loose, so it prevents the glans from escaping.

Play after play last years I have learned to find this additional pressure under the glans to prevent the cock from escaping from the wrap but not killing the glans. It works well to do well the pre-warming so the cock is stiff. With a bit of erection, as the glans is filled of blood and the rope pressure will help avoid it to escape a bit… and increase the arousal. Also, applying pressure under the glans and on the shaft, delays the orgasm (you might want to check about edging and the squeeze technique), so the combination of cock bondage and edging rewards many times with a more intense and long orgasm.

Tied cock and balls require supervision, so please avoid tying the balls or cock during the night, as you can really put at risk your cock and balls, even if you are not going to move at night. Always keep in mind monitoring the color of the glans – you don’t want a purple glans for long time. Be gentle and don’t go beyond 20 minutes the first day.

As a last recommendation, try different types of laces and ropes. I have a small bag where I have 4 different types. Try to use ropes with a width above 4mm, which is a pretty safe limit to avoid injuries. Rounded shoe laces might be around 2-3mm,

• Plain sport shoe laces, to start with and that I can press well as the pressure is even if well tied. With this one I recommend slapping the wrapped cock, as cock spank. Cock spank brings some inflammation to the cock that grows while tied, which makes cock stiff. It’s a progressive play, and requires more supervision. The light pain should be from stretching, but not like a sharp pain, more a bearable discomfort. Sharp pain in balls for me means a stop, for my balls safety.
• Rounded shoe laces that concentrate the pressure in the middle of the rope and you can do much more loops. It’s more intense, it can bring some light pain if doing the fuck thing.
• Leather laces (rounded or plain). Leather is harder than cotton and nylon, and if used for CBT it must be done with care, as it can easily affect circulation and can cause easily an abrasion. The feeling is different as it lacks the elasticity of cotton and nylon. It can turn into a powerful chastity device if applied when the cock is not stiff… and an effective torture.
• Macrame rope (5mm or 6mm) brings an important advantage – despite rounded, it’s soft. It’s half way between plain and rounded laces, so it allows me to tie harder and with more loops. I use it either alone or on top of a wrap done with any of the previous ones. I can then do cock and ball spanking a bit harder. As the cotton rope acts as a second shield that absorbs part of the spanking, I can be slower and be fine-grained in the progression.

For me, cock and ball bondage became the starting point for many other kinky plays. Besides the straight-forward integration with rope bondage and the mentioned cock spank and good fucks on top of a wrapped cock, it serves well as the starting point for other plays as a building block, like sounding, tit torture, edging, electro and even chastity. So start playing with your cock and your balls, as you might want to have some practice by when I reveal the next game!